Observations

I have come to the conclusion that I cannot write a blog as a narrative -- except for a few choice stories -- so I will confine myself to comments, observations, and general bullshit. Here, to whit, are a few things I've noticed or learned in my travels:

-There us a type of whiskey in Ireland called -- I shit you not -- "Black Bush." Try google-ing that one.

-Black Bush is pretty good. Yes, I did just say that: "I like Black Bush."

-Coke bottles in Dublin are really weird: they're either made from a kind of silver or gold plastic material, or they come in tiny glass bottles that look like they would be called "fun sized" in the States.

-Mulled wine is really, really good, especially on a cold night -- just don't gulp it or you might swallow one of the twigs or whatever the shit is they put in there.

-Don't stand too close to somebody at an ATM (and by "too close" I mean within eight feet) or you might get bitched out by and old Czech dyke who thinks you're trying to steal her money in the middle of the day on a crowded street.

-You can buy a bong in Prague for 500 crowns...which is about 25 bucks.

-Salvador Dali exhibit: cool.

-Salvador Dali exhibit on absinth: awesome.

-Alphonse Mucha exhibit: cool.

-Alphone Mucha exhibit on absinth: awesome.

-Irish girls may not always be the hottest (although many of them are) but they are usually the most fun to hang out with

-There are no street signs in Europe; the street names, sometimes, are on the sides of buildings at intersections. When they aren't you have to ask people where you are, which calls attention to your American accent and makes you look like a huge tourist. Either that or whip out your big-ass map and stand there in the middle of the sidewalk squinting at it, which makes you look like an even bigger tourist.

-Czechs and Slovaks love them some dogs. They're everywhere: walking on the streets (sometimes) with their owners, running through bars, shitting everywhere, etc. Despite this, they are all very well behaved; I don't think I've heard a dog bark once. And despite the facts that owners apparently don't have to clean up the dogshit, the streets are all remarkably clean, at least in Prague; they have cleaners come out at night to pick up all the trash and shit that people leave lying around.

-Prague is easily one of the most beautiful cities in the world. Everything is so old, and the architecture is stunning. This is old Europe, very different from Dublin; it's the difference between a city that has been built up over the last two or three hundred years, and one that has been built up over a thousand.

-Castles are cool. Seriously.


-Corona is everywhere. It must be Mexico's biggest export, besides (insert anti-Mexican cliche here).

-When you order a glass of wine in Prague, they don't pour you a glass like they do in America (or Ireland, for that matter). They pour you a little carafe with about three glasses worth in it, and give it to you with an empty wine glass to drink at your leisure.

-Beer in Prague, or at least Pilsner, is cheaper than water.

-There are very few traffic lights in Prague or Bratislava, but there is also very little speeding. This is probably because the streets are all pretty short, and curve and twist and rise and fall a lot. All the drivers are very respectful to pedestrians, too. There were several times when I was about to cross a street but waited to let a car pass, only to have it slow to a stop and the driver motion at me to go ahead.

-They love American music over here: except for the occasional local song, I've heard very little over here that I haven't heard before. That isn't always bad -- the Doors, Simon and Garfunkel, Red Hot Chili Peppers, for example -- but it very often is (Nickelback, Pink, Madonna, etc. I've heard so much goddamn Madonna in the Czech and Slovak Republics that I wonder if 40 years of Soviet domination was as much a matter of taste as it was geopolitical misfortune.)

Alright, that's enough for now. I'm in Bratislava at the moment, and will post soon on some of the shit I've been getting up to here.

Peace